Chris D’Elia Met A Russian Biker Gang | Netflix Is A Joke

Chris D’Elia Met A Russian Biker Gang | Netflix Is A Joke

[Chris D’Elia] Cubans love being Cubans. They’re so fucking
excited, it’s hilarious. You know what the opposite of Cubans are? Russians. Straight up. (Crowd laughing) They don’t give a fuck.
They’re mad always. You never (laughs) You never met a happy Russian ever. Ever. I can prove it right now. You never once in your life
heard a Russian go like this, “Oh my God, no way. Fucking awesome.” (Crowd laughs) That’s why you’re laughing,
you agree with that shit! You ever seen a Russian
outside of Disneyland like, “Hurry up, is the whole crew here? “Let’s go on rides, go! Go! “Come on. Let’s go, go, go!” No! They just stand outside
of Disneyland like, “Fuck this bullshit, I hate this place. “Fuck you, fuck this place. “I hate this. “Mickey and Minnie Mouse, worst
couple ever. I don’t care. “Shittiest place on Earth “I see rollercoaster go by, I follow them. “Fuck you, I don’t care. “Bye, bye! “Oh you coming back for more? “Hey asshole, I see you doing loops. “Asshole dizzy bitch fuck head.” Russians are mad dude. Dude, they never. They just. I used to live in the valley, I moved. But that shit was, man. There was so many Russians
where I was, like, that it was like, Russia. There were (crowd laughs) I go to this coffee shop everyday. I would go to this coffee shop. Everyday. And twelve Russians would
show up on motorcycles, every single day (chuckles) Uh, at like, 1:00 pm. They would all show up,
and I would wait for them, and every time they showed up, they were all pissed off, always. Like so mad, for no reason. And it was like they just drove everyday from their divorce attorney.
Like that’s how it was. They’re like, “I had bad meeting. “I’m going to have to
give wife half of my shit. “Let’s go get coffee, twelve of us.” Like that’s how it was. (Laughs) (Crowd cheers) “I have to…” (laughs) I like that logic. “I had to (Chuckles) I have to give my wife $20,000. “Let’s go get coffee. Twelve of us.” (Laughs) And they’d be pissed off! They’d show up on the motorcycles, and they’d get off the motorcycles, like they hated motorcycles. Like that’s, They would just get off and just be like, “Fuck this bullshit. I hate this, “asshole way of transportation. “Fuck you I don’t care. “I wish I had more wheels. Fuck you! “But my wife took the
other two, I don’t care.” And then they walk into the coffee shop like they hate coffee
they just walk in like, “What is this bullshit? “What is this asshole menu? “Where is barista, come
here barista. This way. “Fuck you, but come here. “But fuck you, but come
here. But fuck you though. “Mainly fuck you, but also come here. “In your asshole, come here. “What is this bullshit drink? “Fuck that bullshit drink. “Fuck you drink. I want one of those. “And I want to drink it but also fuck you. I don’t care. (Laughs) They walk always. They walk around like this way. Like, so you know they’re mad. Fucking chin down. “Chin tucked, “and down. Chin.” Fuck my own chin, I don’t care. “Chin tucked in and down. “Chest out, chin down, “Chest minimum neck
exposure. I don’t care. “Neck is for friends and family only. “Neck is like Mafia, you get in, “nobody comes out. I don’t care. “Chest out for confidence, “Chin down for fuck you. I don’t care.” (Crowd cheers) (Upbeat music)

60 thoughts on “Chris D’Elia Met A Russian Biker Gang | Netflix Is A Joke”

  1. Lmfao. I jokingly stopped near a bunch of big bikes on my Honda Grom and everyone looked pissed off and serious. I said out loud “the smaller the CC, the bigger the PP” because I had seen that quote online and everyone started to laugh…then started to make fun of my PP and CC…but it was fun lmao

    Edit; why do ppl on big bikes always seem so angry? 😂

  2. I lived in the valley for a bit and I would go to this Russian store and the ladies who worked there always acted like that lol. The store had the best mangoes tho. I dont know how they were so pissed when they had so many delicious mangoes lol.

  3. i've been trying to warn people for years; everybody notices such russians but nobody understands why they're everywhere.
    i've done plenty work for them here… america's downfall is obvious.
    we need the russians to defeat those who CHOOSE the evil that is causing the downfall.
    "everybody gets what they deserve." the new forced labor camps are being built, welfare rats and perverts will be growing food one way or another; willingly or as compost.

  4. I'm not Russian and I loathe fucking Disneyland! I hated it so fucking much yet I've been to this miserable place 5 times in my entire life and I fucking swear to God I would never be back!

  5. Mostly our “mad” look is just a habit that have been brought back from Russia, cuz smiling and being over friendly with strangers In Russia considered is innocence Or some kind of craziness. So shut up, and next time you see an unemotional expression on my face Just assume that I just don’t fucking know you, So why the hell I should be smiling at you and being friendly when you’re obviously not my friend or literally anybody.

  6. I feel like a jerk for admitting it, but I agree 100% about Russians. I hear from friends that the people in Russia are great…so maybe it's just the Russians who come to the U.S.

  7. I dated a Russian in high school he was 14 going on 60!
    He was always PISSED OFF!
    Ah, young love with a turd.

  8. Yoo Im Russian and this is literally us our whole lives 😭😭😭😭 we’re not mad we are just normally like that. When we “talk” we yell 😭

  9. Why is Chris such an avid sneaker collector but wears those fucking Flying Dutchman 9’s on every special????

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